Diary of An Emotional Support Canadian

I’m not going to lie to you. This week was rough. Like, “what the fuck do I write that people might actually give a fuck about, and not think that I’m ignoring clearly the only thing that anybody gives a fuck about this week” rough.

I know, I’m an overthinker. It’s my superpower. Whatever.   

I think the best plan of attack is to just be honest. There was a tweet that surfaced on Tuesday from a Canadian who wanted our friends south of the border to know that we were collectively clenching our rectal sphincters for them.  

And man, I felt that one. We have a lot of American friends, both on social media and off. And I found myself reaching out to them to let them know, that even though we don’t have as much skin in the game as they do, that we wanted them to be okay. That we, as the politest people on the planet (sorry, eh, but it’s true), were on stand by to help our closest neighbours through yet another fresh hell that 2020 brings.  

Full disclosure, I am a Canadian History buff, however,  I’m not an expert on American history or American politics. There were essentially three things that shaped my experience of what America is supposed to be. The first was Schoolhouse Rock.  

Shit yeah, I realize I just dated myself. I’m a child of the 1970’s. We didn’t have much, but Schoolhouse Rock cartoons were the absolute best. They were aired on Saturday mornings as interstitial programming in between Jabber Jaw or Scooby Doo or whatever the hell else had you up early and glued to the TV on a Saturday morning.  

As an aside, it makes me a little weepy that kids today won’t have that experience. On demand is just so indulgent…  

Many of these little cartoon interludes were about grammar or math, (I still sing the songs for multiples of 3 and 5 in my head, sorry dad) but the ones I found really interesting were the America Rock series. No More Kings, The Preamble, I’m Just A Bill and The Great American Melting Pot, just to name a few. There I was in my footie pajamas, a little Canadian kid, learning about America. It sounded like an awesome place where people could come from all over the world and be Americans. Amazing.  

I love traveling. It’s the best way to learn. You never forget lessons that you learn in places you’ve been completely immersed in, and I certainly found that when getting the opportunity to travel to a few major cities in the US.  

Nashville, Cleveland, Boston, New York, San Francisco, Chicago, Washington DC. That’s all I managed before the Covid. My first stop after they open the border will be Portland, Oregon, based on many Canadians’ recommendations. I’m open to ideas though, send me an email.

The thing about cities is that I can feel them. You know what I mean? They all have a unique energy; a vibe. And I love that. Dropping into the middle of a city and soaking it up. The history, the architecture (Chicago is my fave for that), the people, the food. These cities have such a vitality, a life of their own.  

I had loved Washington DC so much that I took my sons back (a couple of years later) on an unforgettable road trip. We had arrived in the afternoon after driving all day, and the first place I wanted to take them was to see the Lincoln Memorial. It was one of the most awe-inspiring places I’ve ever been. The history there was incredible. The museums, The Supreme Court. A tangible sense that amazing, groundbreaking things had been and were happening here. My heart swelled at what America meant.  I understood the sense of pride; of wanting to protect it.

Okay, third thing. I’m super stoked that I get to talk about this now. I learned so much about America from the musical Hamilton. Oh man, if you haven’t seen it yet, get fucking Disney Plus and see it now. Like right now. Now now. It’s cool, I’ll wait.   

It’s great right?  RIGHT?? Anway. What a fantastic medium to bring American History to the masses. I laughed. I cried. I cheered. I cried again. And again. And again. Damn you, Angelica! I realize that with entertainment productions, there are factual liberties taken. But Lin Manuel Miranda actually had the dude that wrote the book on Alexander Hamilton (that inspired Miranda to write the musical) on set during development to ensure historical accuracy. It made me proud (as much as a neighbour could be) of where America came from, made me respect the amount of blood that was shed, and the struggles that still lie ahead. It was said that Hamilton was young, scrappy, and hungry. Just like the country he was trying to help establish. Keep that energy.  

I haven’t been to the US in a few years now. Things have just felt different. I know that many people think that Canadians are sitting smugly up north in the snow, but we are entirely too nice for that. Personally, I seem to have an overdeveloped sense of empathy, and frankly it’s exhausting. When Covid hit and the border was closed, it felt very scary. Like nothing was right with the world. But as the weeks closed in on the election, and the unrest in the cities I once visited broke hearts and psyches in both countries, we could feel wave after wave of anxiety from America. Our friends needed US for once.  

And so, I took all that I had learned about America into my new role as an Emotional Support Canadian.  It made me feel somewhat useful to reach out and check on people.  Our two countries have enough in common that we can understand how everything works, (except the health care system... what’s up with that, anyway?) and yet different enough to offer some perspective and comfort. That they would be okay no matter what the result. You can’t see the portrait when you’re in it, right? Canadians have enough geographical and cultural distance that we can be the compassionate friends Americans need us to be. And we were happy to do that.  

The decision is in now, and people have let out a collective exhale. Not because all the issues that have been so divisive as of late will be magically repaired, but because we have an answer to the question we’ve pondered for months now.  We are all interconnected, whether we like it or not, on a global scale. Covid has taught us that. It has showed us what’s important. Love. Compassion. Understanding. Empathy. Let’s all just shake ha... rather nod earnestly to each other and remember our humanity. Be gentle. It’s a shit time right now. Plus, Alex Trebek just died. So fuck you, 2020. I just hope my Emotional Support American is standing by to return the favour.  

Beatrice